Monday Morning Chuckle

It's no surprise to hear that I'm a fan of the TV show Lost. The posts in my blog support that.

Here's something that I got a great laugh out of. It's the "John Locke Rap". Great stuff.

Tarp Funds

In Maine, a staple of everybody’s household is a blue tarp, or “taahp”. Yup, a blue tarp. These come in handy for a plethora of things, and believe me, some people come up with new uses for this large piece of blue plastic.

To be fair, tarps also come in other colors (green or gray come to mind), but it’s the blue variety that finds an audience with Mainahs.

The blue tarp is a versatile product, used in many instances. To cover something, patch something, drag/haul something, the blue tarp is exactly what you need.

Working on your car engine and you need to cover it overnight? Blue tarp. Have a hole in your roof that needs a temporary patch? Cover it with a blue tarp. Need to haul piles of raked leaves to a compost pile? Blue tarp, once again. Keeping your wood dry as it seasons through the summer? Blue tarp. Homemade slip-n-slide in the backyard? Blue tarp, natch. Going camping? Can’t be without a blue tarp.

The blue tarp is so decidedly a Maine-thing that recently an NBA Development team associated with the Boston Celtics (and Charlotte Bobcats) was granted to Portland, Maine. They allowed the general public to vote on a name for the team, and the seven names they came up with were pretty lame (Beacons, Crushers, Claws, Destroyers, Swarm, Traps and eventual winner, the Red Claws). However, many people thought a better name would’ve been the Maine Blue Tarps. Alas, it was not to be. (I personally thought that since Maine is the first state in the United States to be touched by the morning sunrise, a great name would’ve been the Maine Sunrise.)

To be honest, I’m currently without a blue tarp. Yikes! But not to worry, I’m heading to the store to pick one up. They can be found in practically any store in Maine, from department stores, to hardward stores, to Quickie Marts.

If you’re in Maine, you know what I’m talking about. If you come to visit, why not pick up a blue tarp along with your other Maine souvenirs? You never know....you may need it eventually.

For home, work, camping and multitude of other place, the blue tarp is...as we say in Maine...wicked awesome. And we've always got funding to get a tahp.

Wednesday’s Word

Word: Give for (V. phrase)

Definition: to pay

Usage:

“What’d you give for that new car?”

“More’n I should of. Half of it’s plastic, and what’s metal you could shoot a BB gun through. I wish they’d bring put out the old Model A again.”

“Who don’t?”

(Definition from: "How To Talk Yankee", by Gerald Lewis & Tim Sample, copyright 1979, 1986 by The Thorndike Press; copyright 1989 by the First North Country Press)

Did You Know Tuesday

Did you know that the 12 largest lakes in Maine are each over 10,000 acres big? Yeah, I know that’s nothing compared to any one of the Great Lakes. Nonetheless, the lakes are:

1. Moosehead Lake 74,890 acres

2. Sebago Lake 28,771 acres

3. Chesuncook Lake 23,979 acres

4. Flagstaff Lake 20,300 acres

5. Pemadumcook chain of lakes 18,300 acres

6. Spednick Lake 17,219 acres

7. Mooselookmeguntic Lake 16,300 acres

8. East Grand Lake 16,070 acres

9. West Grand Lake 14,340 acres

10. Churchill Lake 13,220 acres

11. Chamberlain Lake 11,084 acres

12. Big Lake (incl Lewey & Long Lakes) 11,505 acres

That’s a total of 265,978 acres taken up by the 12 largest lakes in Maine. Maine itself takes up approximately 22,647,680 acres.

When I go uptacamp, I go to South Twin Lake, one of the 5 lakes in the Pemadumcook chain

This is the view from my seat on the rock...looking at Maine's tallest mountain, Katahdin. Sweet, huh?

And if that info above doesn’t wow you, how about this? Did you know that Maine is the only state in the United States with a one-syllable name? Now you know.

Monday Morning Chuckle

Get your week started off right...with a laugh!

Wednesday’s Word

Word: Xtry (Adj. or N.)

Definition: Something in addition

Usage:

“I wan’t going to trade, but when the dealer said he’d give me something xtry on my old Chevy, I took him up on it. Now I wish I had her back.”

(Definition from: "How To Talk Yankee", by Gerald Lewis & Tim Sample, copyright 1979, 1986 by The Thorndike Press; copyright 1989 by the First North Country Press)

Did You Know Tuesday

Did you know that the Senior League World Series (SLWS) is held in Bangor, Maine? This is the eighth year that Bangor has hosted this baseball series for 14-16 year olds. Currently in its third day of the week-long event for 2009 (as of this posting), the SLWS brings together 10 teams from all over the world to playoff until there’s one winner for the year. Saturday was the opening ceremonies with a presentation of the flags for each of the appearing countries while their national anthem was played by a bagpipe corps. This year, the ten teams are from: Bangor, Maine; Cornwall, Ontario; Fremont, California; Makati City, Philippines; South Vineland, NJ; Friuli Venzia Giulia, Italy; San Nicholas, Aruba; West Madison, WI; Greenville, South Carolina; and Houston, TX.

The event is held at Shawn T. Mansfield Stadium in Bangor. Maine author Stephen King donated nearly $1million dollars back in 1991 to have this stadium built, and it was opened for its first game in June of 1992.

If you’re in the area this week, stop by and check it out. It’s a great event and it supports baseball for these teenagers from all over the world.

The Championship Game is Saturday, August 22. See you there! If you can’t make it, one of the ESPN channels will be carrying the game. Check your local listings.

Monday Morning Chuckle

This Is Just Fucking Dumb

For the past 18 years, August 13 has been labeled as National Left-Handers Day. Yup, someone actually spent the time to get a day for left handed people, and that’s not a slap at left handed people.

So what do they do for the other 364 days of the year? (Full disclosure: I’m abidextrous, so I only celebrated for half of the day).

Wednesday’s Word

Word: Pound up (V.)

Definition: Physically abuse

Usage:

“Jimmy heard what Arthur said about his little sister, and he pounded him up something fierce.”

(Definition from: How to Talk Yankee”, by Gerald Lewis & Tim Sample, copyright 1979, 1986 by the Thorndike Press; copyright 1989 by the First North Country Press)

Did You Know Tuesday

Did you know that the string handle on animal cracker boxes was added in 1902 when the boxes were designed to be given as holiday gifts and hung from the tree? The animal crackers (or ‘biscuits’ as they were called in their country of origin, the United Kingdom) were created in the late 1800s and imported to the US. A factory in York, PA began producing animal crackers in the 1870s, but it was the National Biscuit Company (known today as Nabisco) that first packaged them in the now-familiar boxes and added the string handle for the holiday season. The handle remains to this day though you’re unlikely to see any hanging on the tree.

Monday Morning Chuckle

RIP John Hughes

(Feb 18, 1950 - August 6, 2009)

Writer/director John Hughes died yesterday from a heart attack while walking in New York City. He was only 59. For much of the 1980s it was not hard to find a successful movie that he was involved in. And many of them were wicked funny. You know them.

1983 Mr Mom (writer)

National Lampoon’s Vacation (writer)

1984 Sixteen Candles (writer/director)

1985 The Breakfast Club (writer/director)

Weird Science (writer/director)

National Lampoon’s European Vacation (writer)

1986 Pretty In Pink (writer)

Ferris Bueller’s Day Off (writer/director)

1987 Some Kind of Wonderful (writer)

Planes, Trains & Automobiles (writer/director)

1988 She’s Having a Baby (writer/director)

The Great Outdoors (writer)

1989 Uncle Buck (writer/director)

National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation (writer)

1990 Home Alone (writer)

He went on to write Home Alone 2 and 3, and wrote several other movies right up through 2001.

Bummer to hear of his passing. Not that I really followed his movies after Home Alone came out (movies such as Curly Sue, Dutch, Dennis the Menace and Baby’s Day Out) just didn’t interest me. But those 1980’s movies he either wrote or directed were great, with some classics, including The Breakfast Club, Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, Planes, Trains & Automobiles and Uncle Buck.

A couple of movies he even made uncredited appearances. In The Breakfast Club he appears at the end of the movie as Brian’s father. And in Ferris Bueller’s Day Off he appears as someone who is running between two cabs.

RIP John Hughes.

Wednesday’s Word

Word: Jump down throat (phrase)
Definition: verbal abuse

Usage:
“I guess Elwyn’s pigs did get into Fred’s garden.”

“Ayuh, but Fred didn’t have no call to jump down his throat like that. Elwyn got ‘em out quick’s he could, and they didn’t do much hurt anyway.”

(Definition from: “How to Talk Yankee”, by Gerald Lewis & Tim Sample, copyright 1979, 1986 by the Thorndike Press; copyright 1989 by the First North Country Press)

Did You Know Tuesday

Did you know that the lowest dry point on Earth is the shoreline of the Dead Sea?

Bordering Israel, Jordan and the Middle East, the shoreline sits nearly 1,400 feet (420 meters) below sea level. It continues to become lower every year, dropping nearly a meter a year due to the tectonic plate activity of the Arabian and African plates, upon which it sits.

Monday Morning Chuckle