Friday, November 23, 2007

Chuck Norris is So Tough....

...."how tough is he?" shouts the crowd from Match Game.

There's a new book out. It's based on some game I've never heard of where you try to come up with scenarios that explain just how tough Chuck Norris is. Example (taken from the book): A cobra once bit Chuck Norris' leg, and after five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.

How friggin' hilarious is that???

So, Ian Spector collected some of these sayings and assembled them into a book entitled "The Truth About Chuck Norris". I must have this book.
This is the kind of book that goes in the bathroom right next to your shitter. If it's something you're into, you can find it here at or you can search around the 'net or your local bookstore for it.

Other tidbits from the book glorifying Chuck Norris' awesomeness (taken from the site):
--When an episode of “Walker, Texas Ranger” aired in France, the French surrendered to Chuck Norris just to be on the safe side.
--Chuck Norris once visited The Virgin Islands. Afterward, they were renamed The Islands.
--Chuck Norris can charge a cell phone by rubbing it against his beard.
--Chuck Norris can impregnate women just by staring at them. Men too.

Of course this sort of pop-culture game doesn't get by TFKoP without some further research, and I found the following sites that also play this game. Check 'em out. Very funny stuff.

Hell, Chuck's so awesome someone even made a Wii mii of him!

And just look at the toilet paper he uses. Now THAT'S tough.

I've always known Chuck Norris was tough. I remember in high school seeing Silent Rage at the theater. When he kicked the ass of that genetically altered dude, the era of Chuck Norris' toughness was established. And, the funniest part of the movie? Seeing Stephen Furst in it as The Chuck's deputy...cuz it's just funny seeing Flounder in anything since Animal House...he'll always be Flounder.

Chuck Norris should've been in Animal House. He would've kicked Dean Wormer's ass. After all, he can kick everyone's ass.



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